so_hawkward: ([negi] brooding go away)
One minute, Clint was standing in Jeremy Ellsden's apartment building, watching Deadpool hand him a thumb drive with the background files of every active SHIELD agent.

The next thing Clint knew, he was standing next to Black Cat, who was screaming obscenities and banging on a laptop, while outside the window, Barney ran across a rooftop carrying what looked like the remains of a rocket launcher.

"Hawkeye has only had one indoctrination session. We need to reinforce it."

"There's no time," said Black Cat. "If you don't think he'll be compliant then push him out a window."

Okay, this looks bad. )

[Adapted from Hawkeye vs. Deadpool #4. TW for violence and one particularly gross death.]
so_hawkward: ([hawk] never without my quiver)
Deadpool was a little too chipper when he came back to pick up Clint so they could meet up with SHIELD and the FBI. It was probably a good thing that Clint insisted Barney come along, since Black Cat's mojo meant Clint was steadily breaking everything he touched, like chairs and phones and possibly Barney's sanity.

In which Clint tries to make a plan, Deadpool actually saves the day, and then it all goes to hell. )

[Adapted from Hawkeye vs. Deadpool #2. TW for violence and attempted murder.]
so_hawkward: ([hawk] aimed and ready)
So, when Deadpool said he'd let Clint do all the talking, what he meant was that he'd let Clint talk while knocking out anyone who got in their way.

"You're really a lunatic," Clint said as Deadpool rolled the unconscious coroner into the morgue.

"An effective lunatic!" Deadpool said. "We're inside, aren't we?"

In which Clint tries to solve his problems without violence. Silly Clint. )

[Adapted from Hawkeye vs. Deadpool #1 and #2. TW for violence, ableist language, and brainwashing. Because Clint.]
so_hawkward: ([negi] brooding to the left)
When Kitty went off to deal with the aftermath of her Avengers being attacked, Clint decided this week would be a good time to visit Barney. They'd only gotten into a few fights so far, which was a miracle in itself, and Clint felt a lot better about how the apartment building and his tenants were faring in his absence. The current problem was "solicitors" with thick Russian accents coming by every couple of days, but only one had shown up since Clint had arrived, and he'd quickly turned around at the sight of two Bartons on the stoop. Overall, Clint was feeling pretty good about his promise to Kitty that he'd stay safe on his trip.

*insert maniacal player laughter here* )

[Adapted from Hawkeye vs. Deadpool #0 and #1. TW for violence and suicide. Let's pretend my scheduled post worked right and this went up last night, yes?]
so_hawkward: ([posi] covering my smile)
All things considered, Clint had had a pretty good Thanksgiving. There'd been plenty of food at the apartment potluck, he hadn't burned his contribution (green bean casserole with the crunchy onion things on top), and there'd been plenty of leftovers. That meant he had very little guilt about sneaking another piece of pie out of the kitchen while Barney was distracted on his laptop, muttering something about Space Battles, and collapsing onto the couch to see if there was anything good on TV. It was the middle of the day, so probably not, but he could hope anyway.

[For she who is in the city with him!]
so_hawkward: ([hawk] never without my quiver)
Clint didn't know why he'd thought going back to New York for Christmas would be a good idea. Seriously, he was a grown-ass man, why did he still fall for that "holiday magic" crap?

In which Clint does not have the start to a joyous-ass Kwanzaa. )

[Taken from Hawkeye #6. For the girlfriend, to be continued in the comments!]
so_hawkward: ([posi] almost smirking)
Rooftop potlucks were a typical event at Clint's apartment building, so he hadn't been terribly surprised that Thanksgiving was treated as a more special version of that. There weren't many residents who had family around to visit, or to invite over, but that at least meant they were spending the holiday around people they actually liked. It also meant Kitty was getting a lot of fascinated attention, which Clint was trying not to notice or worry about. Besides, he had bigger things to worry about, like the fact that Grills had somehow acquired a deep fryer for the turkey, and was poking away at it.

"Are you sure those things are allowed here?" he asked for possibly the third time. Or fifth.

"I told you, it's totally safe up here. And besides, the cops have better things to do on Thanksgiving than come up here, and they certainly ain't gonna arrest you, right Hawkguy?"

Clint... wasn't entirely sure about that, to be honest. "I don't know what you're talking about," he said, awkwardly ducking away to look for Kitty. Someday, that answer would get old, but he was pretty sure it was still okay now.

[For Kitty! NFB and all that jazz.]
so_hawkward: ([posi] almost smirking)
If Clint had learned one lesson today about going home to New York, it was to always, always bring some aspirin with him.

In which Clint learns that being a fairy godmother is not all it's cracked up to be. )

[NFI, NFB, OOC okay, etc. Taken from Hawkeye #1 by Matt Fraction and David Aja. Warning for language, and violence against an innocent, pizza-loving animal.]

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Clint Barton

August 2017

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